a newcomer from the Algarve

Last Saturday Gromit and me were hard at work on the laptop when what do you know out of the blue up from the beach came this turtle.

Nosey creatures are turtles. You may wonder what was so riveting to capture the attention of my Wensleydale addicted assistant and entice a turtle out of the sea, across the sand and up the cliff side....

.....but that would be telling.

Gromit is not really a sun dog, but he tells a good tale. His story of short legged horse like creatures with tree branches on their heads who fly and visit the Tardis from time to time made the turtle's eyes pop. So before you could say reindeer I had a turtle stowaway in my rucksack on the return flight. It was a good job for him that Timelord's photo in his new passport mesmerises the immigration guys so much that a little chap can easily pass through unnoticed.

So turtle made his way back to the Tardis but would not rest until he had met the fearsome twosome Robbie and Rudolf. He was not disappointed and last I heard he was happily doing his best with some of those famous magic biscuits.

And by the way he answers to the name of Tyler.

The F-Word

At this time on a Saturday evening Timelord should be sat in the Tardis watching his namesake enjoying his latest .

Instead he has been taken to the Sheraton Algarve in portugal to contemplate the Future with his fellow partners at W&Co. Some irony there for a man on his seventh regeneration.

We have heard from Futurologists. I thought these were the guys who swept chimneys and when our managing partner called his talk "Great Expectations" I thought I must be right.

Apparently there is a guy at Cambridge University who thinks there is someone living today who will be the first person to live a thousand years?!

And this image is of Dublin: the Second Life Dublin. The popularity of that web site is scary. Blogging and Facebook are just the shallows. Dive in deep and live your second life in the (un)reality world of Second Life. It was started in San Francisco (what a surprise) in 2003 it now has 6 million residents and its own currency: Linden dollars.

Unreality: reality. Climate change and Al Gore's film "An Inconvenient Truth" has certainly made big business sit up. If our business does not deal convincingly with environmental issues going forward it will not be in business: and that means more than planting some trees because we have flown out here. Talked to a colleague who came out today about his deal for a major oil company on their first biomass plant in the UK.

And back to basics. How many of us trust each other. Apparently about 60 out of 100 in the 1950s, down to 44 out of 100 in the 1980s and now just 29.

And for the short term future it's a barbecue .....on the beach. Wish you were here!

Back in the Tardis tomorrow.

Ode to Essen

The other Saturday Mrs FLN invited Teapot and myself to join her for lunch at Essen.

This was my first visit and it was rather special to follow in the footsteps of FLN who apparently spent many a Saturday morning over a late breakfast and his newspaper at this eatery.

Teapot is away with her father in Lancashire just now but with Essen in mind I could not resist adding a poem to the many shared in recent weeks by fellow bloggers.

"I sat at a cafe and sipped at a coke
There sat down beside me a WHOPPING great bloke
Who sighed as he elbowed me into the wall:
"Your trouble, my boy, is your belly's too small!
Your bottom's too thin! Take a lesson from me:
I may not be nice but I'm GREAT, you'll agree,
And I've lasted a lifetime by playing this hunch:
The bigger the breakfast, the larger the lunch!

The larger the lunch, then the huger the supper,
The deeper the teapot, the vaster the cupper.
The fatter the sausage, the fuller the tea
The MORE on the table, the BETTER for me!"

His elbows moved in and his elbows moved out,
His belly grew bigger, chins wobbled about,
As forkful by forkful and plate after plate,
He ate and he ate and he ate and he ATE!

I could hardly breathe, I was squashed out of shape,
So under the table I made my escape.
"Aha!" he rejoiced, "when its put to the test,
The fellow who's fattest will come off the best!
Remember, my boy , when it comes to the crunch:
The bigger the breakfast, the larger the lunch!

The larger the lunch, then the huger the supper.
The deeper the teapot, the vaster the cupper.
The fatter the sausage, the fuller the tea.
The MORE on the table, the BETTER for ME!"

A lady came by who was scrubbing the floor
With a mop and a bucket. To even the score,
I lifted the bucket of water and said,
As I poured the whole lot of it over his head:

!I've found all my life, it's a pretty sure bet:
The FULLER the bucket, the WETTER you GET!"

shopping bags

Can you believe it I hear Victor Meldrew say. Sainsbury's gives out 1.6bn plastic bags every year, Asda 1.8bn and Tesco a whopping 4bn.

Apparently 13,000,000,000 bags are given away to shoppers every year.

One Friday in April Sainsburys decided there would be no free plastic bags to encourage shoppers to use reusable bags which for one day were provided free. They normally cost 10p.

How pathetic is that. I can personally assure Sainsburys that if their plastic bags are not free I will not suddenly go shopping at Tesco, Asda, Waitrose or Morrisons.

And then there is that famous bag lady Kate Moss. Apparently when "I'm not a plastic bag" went on sale stores were given only 40 each of this limited edition "bucket bag" design accessory made popular by the good KM and other trendies.

Can we hope that when Gordon the green engine takes over in Downing Street he might follow the lead of the Irish and tax the retailers who provide those bags. 10p a bag. That would soon see a change.

And in the meantime I am happy for to endorse a new designer bag under the Gallifrey label: guaranteed to last through nine regenerations.