Squeeze my foot...

Walking round the shopping aisles of Sainsburys to replenish Timelord's stock of marmite, I came face to face with the squeeze me version.

I know it has been around a while but there are some things which are just not right. Standing on your head for long periods does nothing for the content of your head (big or small) and it can do nothing for the delicious contents of the normal marmite jar.

I fully expect that sometime soon deep into the night the irresitible force contained in the marmite itself will force these squeeze me jars into a somersault so they stand head erect even if the label will then be upside down. You might as well try to ignore gravity.

Anyway supplies are restored and Sunday tea or supper can continue with a slice or two of toast and marmite which is a fitting end to the weekend. It is just the kind of thing you need working away inside to jump start Monday morning (and I am not talking about the car engine!). I have even taken a few marmite sandwiches to work recently for lunch. Much cheaper thsan M&S and no danger of going mouldy!

Now I know there are some unbelievers out there, even among my friends. Mrs FLN confessed to me the other day that she only partakes once a year. Yet I am pleased to say it is a well known fact that reindeer thrive on it.

I also hear from Teapot that EB is not too good just now. Now there is a fellow believer but sadly unequally yoked and for all her qualities Mrs EB has yet to see the light. If he does not mend up soon I will have to go round with some home made bread, butter and a fresh jar to administer its unique pick me up properties

And you never know Mrs EB might just be touched by that special aroma.....

the audacity of hope

This is a blog written with my friend Ethnoquest very much in mind. Although it is the first it will not be the last on the subject of the American presidential election.

The American Presidency is at one of its lowest points in history. It is perhaps captured best by my Christmas shopping trip this evening to the Bull Ring shopping mall in Birmingham.

Looking for a suitable calendar for 2008 for our next door neighbour I came across a stall selling nothing else. And amid the calendars showing scenes of Britian, photos of your local football team, gorgeous girls and gorgeous blokes (!) was a calendar with a separate photo of George W Bush for each month of the year and with it a "Bushism" for the month showing his mastery of the mangling of the English language.

More seriously we either grind our teeth in frustration or stay open mouthed at the irony of three avowedly and certain Christian believers in Tony Blair John Howard and George Bush collectively between them providing more ammunition to turn off the mass of human kind from the gospel than a library of books written by Richard Dworkin and his cronies. I can only detect the master hand of Screwtape, and not even C S Lewis could have written this one.

I digress becuase this is just an introduction to a few words about Barak Obama, one of the democratic party contenders.

He is the kind of guy who comes along regularly oveer the years. Not part of the political establishment, inexperienced, easy to characterise as naive but for all that hugely attractive to all of those millions who are disillusioned by their feelings of being let down by politics and politicians. No doubt the cynics will say he will soon change if he is elected and has to make some hard choices and who can but remember the dizzy expectations here in 1997 when Tony B won his first election.

Barak has recently been gaining ground on Hilary Clinton in the democratic primary polls and I have to say that the thought of Hilary in the White House makes me go numb. And I just wonder what a remarkable thing it would be to have a non white President of the USA far more even than a woman President.

There is something of the Matt Santos in Barak (or is it the other way round) and we West Wing afficionados know what happened there.

And audacity of hope.........

It is the title of a book he wrote and is a phrase he borrowed from a minister of his church, the Trinity United Church of Christ, in Chicago.

Now that is my kind of language.

Hope has been a big big theme for me this year and not just hope but heart searching, God seeking, mind stretching audacious hope.

I'll drink to that this Christmas 2007.

A Christmas Story

Once upon a time in a clearing in the woods stood a group of fir trees. The weather was growing cold and snow was in the air.

Along came the tree man and said to the largest tree of all. "This is your big chance. Not every fir tree can become a Christmas tree but you are tall and strong and will make a wonderful Christmas tree. Now where would you like to go? To the shopping centre; or perhaps a smart office block or may be to stand in front of the Town Hall?"

The Christmas tree thought a little and his needles twitched as they often did when he was thinking. I do not want to go to any of those places he thought. I would like to go to a church. It may be that is the place to hear what Christmas is all about."

The tree man grunted. He had a special way of understanding the ways of trees.

"There will be no fun in a church for you", he said, "and if you think it will be warm in there think again. And you will hear just as much singing and carols and all that outside the Town Hall."

But the fir tree's mind was made up and so off he went in the tree man's lorry to the church. Perhaps the church is near you. Because this is a story you can imagine because part of the fun of stories is all the making up we do in our mind as we read or listen to the story as its tale unfolds.

Soon they arrived outside the church but all was dark and there seemed no way in.

"Oh dear", said the tree man. "I have mixed up the days and I forgot that the nice lady at the church asked me to bring you next week not today and there is no one here to take you in. I am sorry but I will have to leave you somewhere round the back of the church where no one can see you and be tempted to take you away. Never mind. I am sure you will be all right."

So the tree man did just as he said and left the fir tree behind the church out of sight. It was dark and cold and the fir tree was beginning to think that it would have been better to go to that nice shopping centre after all where he would be warm and looked after. He thought about it and his needles twitched some more, perhaps because of all the thinking. Or may be just because of the cold.......and the rain because soon it began to rain.....and rain ......and rain.

The fir tree was now very miserable and sad. Just then two ladies happened by. As we know trees can think but trees cannot talk . But thinking his sad thoughts about the cold and wet made his needles twitch even more and more, so that the two ladies noticed him and shouted.

"Here he is. We have been looking for you. Come inside out of the wet and cold." And they pulled and they heaved the fir tree through the doors of the church to where it was dry if not perhaps too warm. "We will be back in two days to put you in a special place with lights and tinsel and best of all a star right at the top of your topmost branch".

The fir tree felt better and soon went to sleep.

Next day he woke up to hear voices. "Who put this tree in here?" one man said. "Trees don't belong in church" said another. "Whoever heard of a tree in a church?" And off they went chuckling to themselves.

A little later along came a group of young people . They were wearing party clothes and had lots of mince pies and cakes and drinks. "Who put this tree in here?" they said. "It will be in the way. How can we have our party with this tree in the way? It will spoil our games and ruin our clothes if we are caught up in its spikey needles."

As you know fir trees cannot talk. They do not cry. But if they did I expect this tree might have shed a tear. It certainly began to think a few tears and its needles began to shake and shake all over.

Just then the nice lady came into the church with her friend and they began to decorate the tree with lights and tinsel. They found a ladder and put a star on the top of the topmost branch. "Now you are a real Christmas tree and tomorrow is Christmas Day!"

Next day was Christmas Day and the church was full. Everyone was looking at the Christmas Tree and the star shining on the top of the topmost branch.

And a man came to the front of the and invited the children to come and sit with him by the tree. He told them all about Jesus. How he was born in Bethlehem in a stable. How Joseph and Jesus mother Mary came to Bethlehem on the first Christmas Eve and had to stay outside the inn because there was no room for them inside and no one wanted them there. How there was a star over the place where Jesus was and Kings came from far far away to see the new baby and bring him presents...and that every present we give at Christmas reminds us of the presents they brought to Jesus.

The Christmas Tree suddenly felt a special glow. And it wasn't just the Christmas lights. I now know what it is to be part of Christmas, he thought to himself, as he remembered the hours he spent outside the church but even more as he thought about the star on the top of the topmost branch which points people to Jesus.

And as he thought you know what.... yes, his needles twitched and twitched so it seemed as if all the lights and the tinsel were dancing together to celebrate Jesus birthday.